The Dennis Rodman Principal

Dennis Rodman was recently arrested for groping a model at an after-party in Miami. Let me explain why it’s probably not completely his fault.

So I recently got the pleasure of spending a week in beautiful Miami Florida. I was there for a computer conference, however my hotel was also the home of Rock Fashion Week. The hotel atmosphere was definitely something straight out of an episode of Beauty and the Geek. One of the highlights of this stay was a guest appearance by Dennis Rodman dressed completely in Pink as part of the Pink Dress Collection show in support of Breast Cancer Awareness.

I got to be up close and personal with a true NBA legend, and I thought this was a perfect way for Dennis to use his eccentric personality for good instead of evil. If Dennis had just done the show and gone home to bed Karma would once again be on his side. However, the overwhelming temptation of an after-party filled with models was too much for Dennis to resist. Later that night Dennis Rodman was arrested for allegedly assaulting one of the models by grabbing her in areas only the 20 seamstresses backstage at the show are allowed to grab. Dennis of course denies all allegations and has told people to look at the security footage from the club and they will see nothing happened.

Here’s my problem with the situation, I really think there should be some sort of blanket Dennis Rodman clause written into the law. If you live in the USA, or anywhere that gets American television, you know who Dennis Rodman is. Although he was a great rebounder, he is best known for being a completely unhinged alcoholic with poor impulse control. That being said, if you know who Dennis Rodman is, AND you are a beautiful woman, AND you go out to an after-party where alcohol is being served, AND you put yourself within arms length of Dennis, there is a good chance you are going to get groped. It might be completely inadvertent because of his 8 foot long arms and alcohol induced floppy limb syndrome, but the groping will almost certainly occur. It is sort of like if you see an angry cobra coiled in a box, and you decide to jump into that box and dance around, you really have no right to get angry and press charges against that particular snake when it clamps down on your leg. I am not saying Dennis should be above the law, but I do think there are some situations that arise in life, where you just can’t claim you didn’t know the dangers going in. I am all for thrill-seeking, and living on the edge, but you need to realize that taking risks in life will eventually get you bitten by a snake or at least groped by Dennis Rodman.